May 23, 2022 – When Things Fall Apart, Pema Chodron

Fix It

“Someone in the crowd said to him, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the family inheritance with me.” But he said to him, “Friend, who set me to be a judge or arbitrator over you?” And he said to them, “Take care! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed, for one’s life does not consist in the abundance of possessions.” Luke 12:13-15

“As human beings, not only do we seek resolution, but we also feel that we deserve resolution. However, not only do we not deserve resolution, we suffer from resolution. We don’t deserve resolution; we deserve something better than that. We deserve our birthright, which is the middle way, an open state of mind that can relax with paradox and ambiguity. To the degree that we’ve been avoiding uncertainty, we’re naturally going to have withdrawal symptoms—withdrawal from always thinking that there’s a problem and that someone, somewhere, needs to fix it. The middle way is wide open, but it’s tough going, because it goes against the grain of an ancient neurotic pattern that we all share. When we feel lonely, when we feel hopeless, what we want to do is move to the right or the left. We don’t want to sit and feel what we feel. We don’t want to go through the detox. Yet the middle way encourages us to do just that. It encourages us to awaken the bravery that exists in everyone without exception, including you and me.” Chodron, Pema. When Things Fall Apart (Shambhala Classics) (pp. 70-71).

Fix It

We see it all the time. Something happens, a woman is shot by her husband, a car careens out of control and strikes another car, and the blame game begins. Who is responsible? Who should bear the blame and incur the guilt? Why have we lost the ability to sit with a tragedy and simply sigh “life is not fair, it is not easy, and it often has no good reasons or explanations.”

A man yells to Jesus “Tell my brother to split our inheritance.” My question is…who says either deserves anything? Why must we live life thinking we deserve this or that? Why must we live our lives expecting someone will fix all of my problems? If you have come to church thinking G-d will fix your life, you have much to learn about a relationship with G-d.

Pema Chodron says that it is harder to sit with our feelings and feel what we feel rather than place our hurts and feelings upon someone else. She writes… “When we feel lonely, when we feel hopeless, what we want to do is move to the right or the left.” In other words, we look immediately to resolution or blame rather than seeking the wisdom and the lessons in the feelings. Of course it is easier to unburden our emotions upon others than it is to sit with them and learn from them. Instead of constantly running from our feelings, we learn to embrace them, become more insightful about them, embrace them for the lessons they teach us, so we can then be more compassionate towards others and their hurts and pains.

Let us pray,

Lord Jesus, we have lived our lives with the lessons that pain must be alleviated, loneliness eradicated. Help me to embrace my pain, my loneliness so I may be able to assist others when they are hurting. Amen.

Pastor Dave