May 18, 2022 – When Things Fall Apart, Pema Chodron

Room With Many Views

“Do not let your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me. In my Father’s house there are many dwelling places. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you?And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, so that where I am, there you may be also. And you know the way to the place where I am going.” Thomas said to him, “Lord, we do not know where you are going. How can we know the way?” Jesus said to him, “I am the way and the truth and the life.” John 14:1-6

“Things falling apart is a kind of testing and also a kind of healing. We think that the point is to pass the test or to overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy. When we think that something is going to bring us pleasure, we don’t know what’s really going to happen. When we think something is going to give us misery, we don’t know. Letting there be room for not knowing is the most important thing of all.” Chodron, Pema. When Things Fall Apart (p. 14).

Room With Many Views

We often think that there isn’t enough room – enough room in our stomach for desert; enough room in the car for another rider; enough room in the house for another baby. I have often preached on the idea that our lives are filled with all kinds of rooms – from the rooms we lived in as a child, to the nursery we created for the newborn in our lives – we move from room to room throughout our lives. Some of those rooms are small and cozy – others so expansive we have no clue how we are going to fill them.

Pema Chodron talks about allowing room in our lives, not for knowledge or knowing, but for “..not knowing.” That is a space none of us like to think about filling, although our lives are crammed with lots of un-knowing. We do not know who will win the Super Bowl next year, though already many are making their projections. We do not know if we will be alive next year, though we have no plans for allowing for our own demise. Pema goes on to write… “We never know if we’re going to fall flat or sit up tall. When there’s a big disappointment, we don’t know if that’s the end of the story. It may be just the beginning of a great adventure. (p. 14) The off-center, in-between state is an ideal situation, a situation in which we don’t get caught and we can open our hearts and minds beyond limit. It’s a very tender, nonaggressive, open-ended state of affairs.”  (p. 16)

Every adventure has begun with a first step, a first decision, a first inkling as to the potential for disaster or success. If we never hold open the chance for “not knowing”, if when all heck is breaking loose around us we do not at the least hold open some expectation to be “surprised”, we will never be settled enough to realize how surprisingly generous, loving and merciful our G-d truly is.

Let us pray,

Lord Jesus, you are the way and the truth – and a relationship with you truly gives us life. This I know. Help me with all of the “unknowing” that will come to me today. Amen.

Pastor Dave