“So she went down to the threshing floor and did just as her mother-in-law had instructed her. When Boaz had eaten and drunk, and he was in a contented mood, he went to lie down at the end of the heap of grain. Then she came stealthily and uncovered his feet, and lay down. At midnight the man was startled, and turned over, and there, lying at his feet, was a woman! He said, “Who are you?” And she answered, “I am Ruth, your servant; spread your cloak over your servant, for you are next-of-kin.” He said, “May you be blessed by the Lord, my daughter; this last instance of your loyalty is better than the first; you have not gone after young men, whether poor or rich. And now, my daughter, do not be afraid, I will do for you all that you ask, for all the assembly of my people know that you are a worthy woman.” (Ruth 3:6-11)

“Marriage is not a noun; it’s a verb. It isn’t something you get. It’s something you do. It’s the way you love your partner every day.” (Barbara De Angelis)

Being married should be a joy as much as a “work” in this life. Therefore, it should be engaged in with great seriousness, with earnest prayers for direction, for the blessing of G-d. Too many people do not give marriage the seriousness it deserves.

When I counsel couples on marriage, I tell them a good marriage takes the “Three C’s” of relationships: Communication, Compromise, and Compassion. Honest and open communication will save every marriage, or at least most. Compromise, being able to see the “other’s” point of view will help a couple come to reconciliation with an open heart and mind. And Compassion is necessary in every relationship – if you are unwilling to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes, you will never be able to truly understand their struggles.

Marriage in the time of Naomi and Ruth appears strange to us; but it was according to the laws and the practices of Israel. Where is the state of marriage going in our society? How do women or men seek to lay “claim” on someone today? How do the laws of our society or the expectations of our society help or hinder marriage? I ask these questions because, as Barbara De Angelis states, marriage is a verb. Marriage is something you do, something you live into, something that takes a lot of work. If we go into the state of marriage with a cavalier attitude, it will not receive the attention it so earnestly deserves. Jesus blessed the state of marriage with his presence at the wedding in Cana – as such, every wedding, every marriage should also have the blessings of Jesus intricately woven into the fabric of its status.

Pastor Dave