we held our noses — collectively
through the summer of regret and hyperbole:
“the greatest” – “the richest” – “big and beautiful”
cackling at our made up names for all we left behind…
and then…Flash!

oh what we would do
to return to the good old days of
digging in the dirt – mining our treasures
like lost gold diggers and hucksters…hucksters
wanting to sell, sell, and sell to any who also
treasured the past;
and then….Flash!

the reward of soft work and big lies
is never long enduring or appealing –
when the true measure of any life will be
judged, judged….and judged. you can’t hide
incompetency from others like you can from
your family – but the searching eyes of enemies
and history see through the smoke;
and then….Flash!

lies and half-lies and alternative lies
become the sands that give way under our feet;
we sink as far as we have buried the bedrock
of our lives — the rock of integrity upon the
rock of truth upon the rock of love;
and then….Flash!…There Goes My Life

Praying in silence is praying in solace;
Praying to silence is praying to no less
than unrelenting and excruciatingly
emptiness emptied of all its nothingness.

Is there nothing to seek beyond these endless
torturous prayers seeking soul-numbing redress?
The silence consumes me indeterminately
night upon night in this silent address.

Praying to silence fills my unfulfilled purpose
in the abyss of my hearts inner substance;
praying endlessly, searchingly, expectantly
heartbeat upon heartbeat — beating and breathless.

Listen for G-d’s voice the unknowing mysterious
where prayers form the boundary of eternal darkness;
pray and pray and pray unceasingly
pray to the silence and pray to no less!